Wednesday, February 9, 2011

My first blog

     Never blogged before, never thought about blogging before. However the last few days thinking over things that have happened in my life. I thought it would be a good way to journal and share some of those crazy and miraculous things. I've come to admit this week that maybe I am dealing with a little depression. Reminding myself through this blog, of great blessings God has given me, is the best way to remember I have so much to be happy about and very little to be down about. So as much as this to share, it is just as much for me to reflect.
    I am blessed with a wonderful husband of fifteen years. He is the love of my life!!! I know he loves me and loves our children with everything he is made of. We have six beautiful children, five boys and one girl that falls right in the middle. They make life interesting. My life would be boring without them. They are a package! God knew when he gave me one He had to give me the other five.
   In order to give a little background on my husband and I you have to go back 28 years. We met in Sunday school class. We were both five in the kindergarten class. I think I loved him the first time I saw him. It didn't take long till we were together all the time at church. Sunday afternoons we would go to my house and play for the afternoon. I remember watching Gentle Ben and Flipper with him. We would hold hands and smile at each other every time my mom left the room. This was often the way we would spend time together till we were eleven. That seemed to be the age that everything in my life flipped upside down. The church we attended ended up in the middle of a scandal...if that's what you call it. Our church split, and many of our members either went to different churches or decided they didn't want to walk with the Lord any more due to what happened with our pastor. Shortly after we voted in a new pastor Doug's mom made a decision to leave our church. I didn't see him again till we were 17. In those years yes I had boyfriends, they were never right for me. I remembered Doug in those years we didn't see each other. So when I saw him at our church Christmas play butterfly's filled my belly. A year later we were married.
     Within the time between Doug coming back to church and our wedding I was battling horrible symptoms from my Dystonia. Walking had become almost impossible and the tremors in my left side were unbearable. I told Doug that I didn't want to get serious if he was not willing to accept the fact that most likely I would be confined to a wheel chair. He not only accepted the fact that I would not get better, but he wanted to marry me in spite of the fact. Shortly after we decided to get married I went to see a specialist hours away from our little town. The Dr had no good news. I told her that I was getting married and we would someday like to have children. She looked at me like it was the kind of news she gave everyday and told me not to get my hopes up, we most likely would never have children due to my neurological condition. Upon returning home Doug and I talked. I told him the news that I could never give him the children he wanted. Earlier in that year he told me that he wanted a dozen children, and that was honest truth. Loving kids the way I did I was so thrilled to find someone who wanted a large family. Now knowing we could never have kids broke both our hearts, but he looked at me in the face and said "I still want you to be my wife." A month later we were married. Seniors in high school and against all odds we were determined to break all odds and stay together for the rest of our lives. Breaking odds is just what we've done the last fifteen years.
I know this isn't much in the way of a big blog, but it expresses what I have to be thankful for today which is a faithful husband which loves me very much! Despite all the doom and gloom that was to be in our future he never listened to it. Always looking forward to what is and what could be. More than anything loved me for me.